emotional baggage

Take a risk, forgive, be happy in the new year

I, for one, am tired of setting new goals every New Year’s Eve. It has never gone well. I’m ready to admit that there is never going to be a ‘new’ me. There might be a wiser me, a more patient me, a calmer me, but the core will be the same old me. This year I’m trying something new, in the never ending quest to improve myself. I’m making a list of things I don’t want to bring with me into 2017. We all carry around a lot of baggage, and some things (disappointments, hurts, you get the idea) become too much to keep carrying. I am going to figure out which are those bits of baggage that I’m sick and tired of carrying with me, and leave them behind.

Regrets: We all have regrets – either something we did or something we didn’t do. It is what it is. I won’t make the same mistakes again, so I’ve noted the lesson. If your regret caused harm or hurt to someone else, now is the time to acknowledge it directly with the person. This will free you from the regret and the other person from possible resentment. Most of my regrets are beyond my power to fix now. If it is fixable, and you would feel better, go for it. Otherwise, leave regrets behind.

Hurts and grudges: If the person knows they hurt you, forgive them. If they don’t know they hurt you, it’s really easy to leave it behind. Carrying hurts and grudges is stifling. I tend to get my knickers in a twist over people who hurt someone I love, particularly my husband or children, and I’m REALLY good at remembering those infractions for years! I have come to realize that often the person hurt has moved on while I’m still holding a grudge! Time to leave those behind.

Fears and Anxieties: I do not like risks, but the few times I have taken a risk, and done something out of my comfort zone, I have been very happy with myself. What holds me back? Probably what holds all of us back and keeps us from growing – fear of embarrassment, failure, pain, the unknown. If you’d be happy having done the scary thing, or if you feel like a boring, wimpy recluse when you demure, then DO IT!! Acknowledge the fear and leave it behind.

We are only two days past New Year’s Eve, so write down the things you most want to leave behind. Don’t share it with anyone. When your resolve is clear to leave those things behind, toss the list in the fire and start your new year.